International

Come on then the what's the million dollar question?

Who got in the England squad for the Twenty20 pot of gold?

Correct! If only it was that easy... Personnel then please!

In the words of Thom Yorke, there were no surprises with Ryan Sidebottom returning in place of Tim Bresnan, although Alastiar Cook's place in the 15 surely just means he gets a free holiday.

I can't remember the last time he cleared the ropes?

He never has!

Weren't the central contracts dished out?

Michael Vaughan's diligent service to English cricket as well as an impressive record against the Aussies earns him the nod alongside Stuart Broad ahead of Matthew Hoggard.

What's your verdict?

Naming the same side for the Stanford Series as well as the one-day series in India bodes and reflects well on Kevin Pietersen's immediate impact upon the side as captain.

Wow, that doesn't happen very often - so what about Steve Harmison?

His timely reinvention as a one-day cricketer looks set to bolster his bank as well as his Ashes chances.

These new Increment contracts. What are they like, some U21 club?

Not quite. It's just for those who are regulars in the squad but haven't yet cemented their spots such as Matt Prior and Tim Ambrose as England's wicket-keeping dilemma rolls on.

Squad for Stanford and India ODIs: Kevin Pietersen (capt), James Anderson, Ian Bell, Ravi Bopara, Stuart Broad, Paul Collingwood, Alastair Cook, Andrew Flintoff, Stephen Harmison, Samit Patel, Matt Prior (wk), Owais Shah, Graeme Swann, Ryan Sidebottom, Luke Wright

Central contracts: James Anderson, Ian Bell, Stuart Broad, Paul Collingwood, Alastair Cook, Andrew Flintoff, Stephen Harmison, Monty Panesar, Kevin Pietersen, Ryan Sidebottom, Andrew Strauss, Michael Vaughan.

Increment contracts: Tim Ambrose, Ravi Bopara, Samit Patel, Matt Prior, Owais Shah, Graeme Swann, Luke Wright.

FIRST TEST, Lord's - Day One
England v New Zealand 208-6 - bad light stops play

You have to feel for him...
Who says?

I just mean, he was unlucky not to make his century...
Yeah, but I dont HAVE to feel for him, do I? It's not like it's the law, is it?

Well, no. So who did the damage for England?
Initially, Jimmy Anderson. The Burnley bowling machine removed both openers within the first eight overs, ably assisted by Stuart Broad who took a couple of wickets as well. If England can polish off the remaining four wickets nice and early tomorrow, then they'll be in the driving seat.

Is there an actual driving seat big enough to accommodate the entire England team then?
No.

Anything else to report?
Oh yes. England had a new dazzlingly white kit.

Sounds nice...
David Lloyd in the Sky commentary box didn't think so. He said the team looked like "a bunch of decorators".

Was he right?
No.

Nothing new there then.
Quite.

The summer has officially started. Beaches have been packed, rain has been predicted to pour cold water on any hopes of the hottest May to date, ice-creams are selling out by the truck-load and the Test Series is about to commence.

England head into the Lords curtain raiser with the edge after claiming a slender 2-1 victory in the Land of the Long White Cloud but New Zealanders love nothing more than to be written off, especially before a match at the spiritual home of cricket.

England have avoided a media shower of abuse by keeping the same winning side, so Matthew Hoggard didn't do a Lawrence Dallaglio and talk his way back into the side. Ryan Sidebottom will be England's trump card after his sensational 2007, posting career-best after career-best, taking hat-tricks and becoming the rock of England's bowling attack. It's a big series for Michael Vaughan whose position has come under increasing scrutiny although losing him would undoubtedly do more damage than good.

With Adil Rashid waiting in the wings, Monty Panesar must turn the tide back in his favour with more consistency and flight in his looping left-armers.

The tour is picking up speed for the Black Caps with players returning from the IPL, unearthing a gem in Aaron Redmond to replace the now departed skipper, Stephen Fleming, while his replacement Daniel Vettori looks to have shaken off a niggle to take the reigns ahead of the 1st Test.

New Zealand's record in England isn't exceptional to put it lightly having won just eight of their last 91 tests, although four of those antique victories have come at Lords, so there is hope, albeit very little.

One's to watch out for:

Andrew Strauss: Back at Lords and started the season in fine feather, the leftie has been restored to his best position in the openers slot.

Brendon McCullum: Still yet to post a century against a 'major' Test playing nation, but the wicket-keeper showed his explosive best in the IPL.

Prediction: England to win by four wickets.

Teams:

England 1 Andrew Strauss, 2 Alastair Cook, 3 Michael Vaughan (capt), 4 Kevin Pietersen, 5 Ian Bell, 6 Paul Collingwood, 7 Tim Ambrose (wk), 8 Stuart Broad, 9 Ryan Sidebottom, 10 James Anderson, 11 Monty Panesar.

New Zealand (probable) 1 Jamie How, 2 Aaron Redmond, 3 James Marshall, 4 Ross Taylor, 5 Brendon McCullum, 6 Daniel Flynn, 7 Jacob Oram, 8 Daniel Vettori (capt), 9 Kyle Mills, 10 Tim Southee, 11 Chris Martin.

The big cuddly guy is back...

Controversial umpire Darrell Hair will return to Test cricket in May when he stands in the second Test between England and New Zealand at Old Trafford between May 23-27. Hair had been removed from the ICC's elite panel after the infamous Oval Test in 2006 when Pakistan forefeited thier match against England after accusations of ball tampering and anti-Pakistan bias.

So there's a fight for second spot in the Test rankings going on in Chennai.

India and South Africa are getting some batting practice in. The Proteas might have enjoyed first use of a placid pitch but India have hit back with vigour.

What did Harbhajan punch Dale Steyn?

No but he did take five wickets. South Africa made 540 in their first innings with Hashim Amla patiently manoeuvring his way to 159 helped by Greame Smith (73) Neil McKenzie (94) and Mark Boucher (70) but 'the turbanator' weaved some magic for his 21st five-wicket haul.

Mammoth effort. How did India respond?

As only India can. Virender Sehwag had everyone drooling with a brethtaking triple century.

Wow! That's the second time he's gone past 300 isn't it?

He joined Brian Lara and Sir Don Bradman as the third guy to reach the landmark. But more impressively he did it in only 278 ball, beating Walter Hammond's monster effort against New Zealand in 1933 by 77 balls.

He's not bad is he?

Sehwag's last ten hundreds have been in excess of 150, so his conversion rate is pretty useful. Makhaya was very generous giving him a full bunger on leg stick to go past 300 and now he's unbeaten on 309, equalling his previous Test best.

How about the other two guys that had a go?

Wasim Jaffer's (77) doggedness and Rahul Dravid's (63*) customary brick wall were the perfect foil for Sehwag. It was the first time India had posted two double hundred partnerships.

Must've been cheating!

Takes one to know one...